Alas, Canadian television

I have to give them some credit. Suffering from an inexplicable dearth of ideas (inexplicable to me because I know many talented writers and screenwriters who are withering away in anonymity), the CBC has lately turned to French Québec television for inspiration.

Last summer, they introduced Rumours, an English adaptation of the wildly popular Quebec television series, Rumeurs. The original series is remarkable for its sharply-written and crisply-paced humour - quips are delivered with the speed and efficiency of a machine gun. Look into your bowl of jello for a moment and chances are, you've missed three zingers. A little like the Maddie Hayes-Dave Addison repartee we so thoroughly relished on Moonlighting.

Problem is, if you've seen the original series, watching the English remake is a little disappointing. The pace is slower and it's got no teeth - kind of like Little Mosque on the Prairie. That is, there is so much potential for true hilarity, but the writers/producers have chosen to go the *safe* route so as not to bear the brunt of their more conservative viewership.

So this January, the CBC introduced Sophie, the English adaptation of Les hauts et les bas de Sophie Paquin.

I saw an episode of Sophie this week and developed some issues early on that I am not sure I can overcome. Namely:

• The father of Sophie's baby turns out to be a black man. However, it doesn't look like they used a black baby. It looks like a white baby with a thick - and uneven - layer of brown icing.
• Sara Botsford has the most unbelievable English accent in the history of acting.
• Natalie Brown (remember her from that Bailey's commercial?) is not a natural ham. This role requires a truly comedic actress with the ability to pull off physical, as well as verbal humour. NB can catch a drop of Bailey's on her tongue, sure, but she won't be giving Carol Burnett or Mary Tyler Moore a run for their money any time soon.
• Can the blond bombshell friend be any more two-dimensional and vapid? She could easily be replaced by a paper cut-out. No substance or unique personality to her whatsoever.
• Stereotypical gay male best friend getting his back waxed and trying to get laid by a 19-yr old. Yawwwn. See objections listed for blond bombshell character.

I haven't seen the French original yet, but I'll report back when I do. In the meantime, if you have any redeeming arguments, please do share them.